The Scarlet Letter
Volume I, Number 4 | May 1994
by Fr. Catfish-Seahorse
Now I have an idea. I shall write a holy book and call it The Alchemikal Marriage of Catfish-Seahorse and I shall take it to Germany and hide it in one of my Secret Places, known only to a few. After a number of years I will send someone to Germany to accidentally discover the book and to create a church around it...perhaps a couple of churches. One church could be called "The Church Of The Ancient And Mystical Rosy Seahorse" and the other could be called "The Church Of The Exalted Catfish." One of these fine churches could be the subsidary of another, at least in the beginning. Then they could separate and we could have many fine arguments and persecutions based around whether one church is, or is not, a part of the other. Further, we could quarrel about which priests and bishops are genuine and whether they have a certificate proving their right to claim apostolic succession. We could also quarrel about such things as whether or not the members of one church have the right to piss in the toilet at the other church. We can create enough rules and confusion to last us until the Rapture.
Also, in this issue of The Scarlet Letter, I have published two poems, one demonstrating the essence of my Catfish nature, the other proudly proclaiming my Seahorse heritage. For the purpose of this issue I have split myself in two; one poem will be published under the name Frater Catfish and the other under Frater Seahorse. Thus will the two parts of my nature be made known.
But only for this issue. The Seahorse rides upon the back of the fried Catfish, and they shall no more be separated. Henceforth my work shall be published under the two names joined, for I am whole.
Though the tail of the Catfish may brush the muddy pond bottom and create a particulate haze, the Divine Seahorse riding on its back provides a sure compass. Study on this.